Blog

Light-heartedness reveals the path through darker months ahead

The transition from Summer to Autumn can stir up unsettling feelings as light begins to fade and days rapidly become shorter. It’s OK if you’re experiencing overwhelm about this inevitable shift. World Mental Health Day is nicely placed within the calendar to remind us that our wellbeing deserves some attention and care. It’s a nudge to be kind to ourselves and others, because mental health affects us ALL.

As many of you will be aware, I love Halloween. Not because I love dressing up, (which I do,) but because it encourages a playful view on fear. It’s easier to laugh at unbelievable creatures and tropes. When we appreciate costumes of those around us and transform ourselves, we can acknowledge what’s real and difficult more easily.

Not a fan of October 31st? You can still learn from some its ideas. The season shows us the importance of curiosity. How can we learn more about, and take an interest in, the things that scare us? I’m not saying this is easy but it’s a start.

I believe that cobwebs should add to a spooky scene at Halloween, rather than exist because we’re trying to ignore our tricky feelings. Although I find it tricky how boring cleaning is… so I guess cobwebs are unavoidable.

Halloween gives us permission to be silly while simultaneously being creative. We dress up, give pumpkins faces, and howl at the moon. (Just me?) Being light-hearted isn’t ignoring our problems, it’s actually regulating. Our brain observes that we can’t be in danger if we’re having fun. Tension eases, overwhelm gets interrupted and we can reconnect with the pieces of ourselves stress and responsibility has stolen.

We can also shine a light on the monsters known as stress, anxiety, self-doubt, terror and burnout by naming them as such. Otherwise they remain invisible and follow us around like that one red stain from fake blood, refusing to budge no matter how hard you scrub. Whatever their number, size or level of visibility, you don’t have to face these monsters alone. Share how you’re feeling with a friend or someone you trust. Chances are they’ve felt similarly at some point in their lives. Connection is such a valuable part of any self-care plan.

I used to be frightened of admitting I was struggling. Fear of being judged and terrified of the knock on effects of being perceived as weak. What if I couldn’t manage my workload and let people down? It was the kindness of others (unexpected in some cases) that made the biggest difference. Kindness is like a lantern, illuminating the way ahead, even if we can only see one foot in front of us. With light often comes warmth. Not that we need much more warmth this month!

If you’ve followed my Z–A blog season over the last few years, you’ll know I’m a big believer in small, doable steps. So I invite you to check in with yourself this World Mental Health Day. By candle light seems apt…

What tiny rituals or gentle practices can be peppered across your routine to create space? Some thoughts: • Taking a few deep breaths • Stretch breaks (especially if mentally or emotionally stretched) • A cup of tea before starting work • Journaling, or doodling • Walking or meditating at dusk

Do what feels simple for you. It’s not just about what we’re aware of and what we do on 10th October every year. Mental health matters every single day.

If you’re struggling with remaining calm and steady this season, book a call here and let’s have a chat.

A is for Aloe Vera, Anchoring & Aurora Borealis

Ahoy! All aboard an adventure through the letter A. As we arrive at the twenty sixth and final stop on our journey from Z, I’ve assembled some assets which I hope will amplify, awaken or astound you in abundance.

What to use: Aloe Vera

One of nature’s most important doctors (in my mind), Aloe Vera has been soothing us for over 4,000 years. The Ancient Egyptians used it in the baths of royalty and referred to it as the ‘plant of immortality.’ While we’re probably not making the same claims, I think the majority of aloe fans would agree with Boots’ label of ‘super-soother’.

In its many forms (including gel, ointment, drinks and supplements), this is a plant that’s practically anti everything (bacterial, viral, septic, oxidant). No wonder the pharmaceutical and food industries hold it in great esteem.

I’m sure you’re familiar with how it treats skin issues such as irritation and minor burns. But did you know it reduces mouth and dental nasties such as plaque and ulcers? The second one I can personally vouch for – having experimented with a toothpaste in the last year. One of the key ingredients is aloe. I can’t remember the last time I had a crippling canker sore (and I’ve had some real humdingers from childhood). What a win!

This gem has also been known to:

• slow signs of aging
• reduce constipation and support digestive upset
• support the absorption of nutrients
• lower blood sugar

So whether you use it as a lotion or ingest it – it’s definitely your friend. Research is still being carried out, but there’s some evidence to suggest aloe vera can help with acne and hair repair too. So watch this space. As always, apply with caution. With any skincare product, there are still risks.

What to try: Anchoring

Anchoring is a simple but powerful mindfulness technique for helping us to feel grounded and stable in uncertain situations or circumstances. Effectively, we can anchor ourselves to the present moment to reduce stress or fear. We can also bring forth a memory or feeling we want to use in a challenging moment/space. The most common one I use with clients is ‘imagine you’re strolling along a beautiful sandy beach.’

Ships use anchors to remain in safe position in a turbulent sea. In the same way, we can connect to ideas and objects that bring us a sense of calm no matter what. Emotional anchors support the nervous system. We can feel shifts in our mood and events around us without feeling overwhelmed by any of it. They don’t stop us feeling it – they change the way we hold it.

It can be something as basic as focusing on our breath, but here are some other examples, using the senses:

• smelling lavender
• listening to a favourite song
• tasting peppermint
• looking at a photo of a loved one
• holding cotton wool against skin.

Anchors should be personal. Why not link to a ritual such as making a cup of tea, putting shoes on before a walk or journaling. Gestures can be very positive too. Have you ever touched your finger and thumb together while closing your eyes and thinking of a time when you felt confident? Try it now.

• Notice as much detail about the memory as possible
• Let yourself indulge in all the positive energy and bring it forth into the present with you.
• Stay in that lovely space for a few minutes.
• Practice as often as possible. It takes time to cement but it’s worth it.

• You can have as many anchors as you want for different situations. Be sure to change them over time, as you change.

What to see: Aurora Borealis

All about the pretty coloured lights and names that sound absolutely exquisite, the Aurora Borealis (Northern) and Australis (Southern hemisphere) are very real but magical. Everyone wants to see them and there’s extreme competition for the best photo. Interestingly though, sometimes the lights put on a better performance for the camera than they do the naked eye.

Oxygen and nitrogen in our atmosphere give off different colours when they are heated so we get a spectacular show. Waves and patterns dance and pulsate across the sky. Mostly visible near the Arctic Circle, these babies have been known to appear way beyond their limits if there’s higher solar activity.

If, like me, you haven’t yet had the privilege and want to find them for yourself, here’s some tips:

• Get informed. There are many alerts and articles on latest sightings (check out AuroraWatch)
• The darker the better – find a field out in the countryside, as far north as you can in the UK.
• Be prepared to wait and understand that you might not see them.

Let’s not forget the most recently talked about member of the aurora family, STEVE. (Strong Thermal Emission Velocity Enhancement). A hybrid which is visible from lower latitudes and closer to the equator than the auroras.

What almighty words:

Acquiesce

Some fancy definitions equal to the word itself but this is the one I like best – “submit or comply silently or without protest; agree; consent.”

Alchemy

The power to change or create things in mysterious or magical ways.

Anomaly

Lots of possible options for this word. Let’s go with the most ‘sci-fi’ one. “An odd, peculiar, or strange condition, situation, quality, etc.”

Archipelago

A group of small islands or an area of sea where you find them.

I hope the letter A assists you in amazing achievements in April.

B is for Before Sunrise, Bingo & Butterflies

Here to brighten up the last few days of winter, behold beautiful B. Browse this batch to help you bloom.

What to watch: Before Sunrise

The first one in a trilogy by Richard Linklater, Before Sunrise is an ode to the transitory nature of human beings and the picturesque Vienna landscape.

Two captivating characters learn about each other as they explore the city as a physical place, and their blossoming relationship. Both open up many questions about life and death. I enjoyed the pace, the realism and the ambience of a 90s film too.

Warning – this will probably make you want to watch the two other films, if you haven’t already.

What to play: Bingo

It’s 41 - time for fun? There's a simple but lively essence to Bingo: matching numbers pulled at random with others on cards in grids. Shouting out when you've got a line or full house (often to a groan from the rest of the room if you're in a hall.) The rush of adrenaline when there's only one square left to mark.

Other benefits include: Although mostly known for being an older person's game, anyone can play and it's not just about winning money (if this element becomes a problem/addictive, please seek support.) Crossing out items in a box has become a party game. I.e. watching a predictable TV show - how many cliches are there? Fun and laughter in full flow.

Bingo helps with memory issues, social connection and establishing routine (as it's often the same time each day or week.) Online play has also opened up a platform for emotional support which combats loneliness. Web users can connect in forums and make new friends.

What to appreciate: Butterflies

Butterflies are the epitome of transformation – how something can start looking plain or even ugly, go through numerous and necessary changes and be reborn. For these fascinating creatures, it’s a four stage process.

With over 18,500 named species, the colours and patterns are extensive and mind boggling. Here are some fun facts about the more uplifting breed of Lepidoptera.

• Antarctica is the only continent on Earth where they seemingly don’t exist.
• Being cold blooded, they won't fly in conditions below 10 degrees (Celsius) – can anyone else relate? They also need heat to move, so rest in sunshine to warm up their wings.
• They can see colours not on the human spectrum (but sadly can’t tell us about it.)
• Many types can taste with their feet – easier to know if the leaf is good enough for food or to lay eggs.

What brilliant words:

Ballyhoo

Extravagant publicity or fuss.

Bathos

(in Arts and Literature, Ancient Greek word) Often used for comedic effect – a sudden change from fancy, important or elegant to silly, trivial or even vulgar.

Bijou

French word meaning small and elegant. Also half the name of one of my favourite jewellery shops…sadly not in the UK anymore.

Bumph

Technically the word means useless and unimportant materials, like unasked for post. I think it can apply to anything admin-related though. A fab word for something that lacks meaning.

I hope the letter B is a beacon of balance and bliss for you in March.

C is for Candles, Charades & Cloud Gazing

Three cheers to celebrate C as we carry the calendar into 2026. A collection or collage (if you will) chosen for calm and clarity in the first month. Curious?

What to appreciate: Candles

Did you know that candles have been providing us with light for over 5,000 years? The Ancient Egyptians used animal fat, rolled papyrus and beeswax for some of the earliest versions. It was spermaceti wax, a brighter burner, which made them more standard however.

They’ve always been a part of sacred ceremonies but over the years our waxy friends have been used for many purposes. Here's but a few:

Promoting better mental and physical health

• to soothe, calm and relax us
• restful sleep
• feelings of safety in the dark (literally)
• the smells release happy hormones and activate the parasympathetic nervous system

To create atmosphere and ambience

• romantic candlelit dinner anyone?
• carry one around in an old creepy house?
• decorative ornaments, adding to a homely glow

Routine and ritual

• religious services
• annual celebrations
• the daily wind down for bed

Now we're in the 21st century, candles are available in every colour, shape, scent and material imaginable. Courses to create one are in abundance.

What to play: Charades

Often played over holidays like Christmas, this action and expression game requires no technology or even equipment. It’s a timeless treat for bringing families, friends and strangers together. It helps if you’re good at miming but funnier if you’re really not.

For those not familiar with the game, each person or team takes turns to act out prompts from film/TV, books, situations and experiences. The other side have to guess what on earth you’re doing. With so many variations and personalisation, the silliness is endless.

Charades can pull us out of our comfort zone and improve confidence, social skills, creativity and problem solving.

What to take part in: Cloud Gazing

Writing this, I’ve discovered I’m a closeted nephophile - a person who loves sky and clouds. There’s something almost fantastical about laying on the ground (preferably on a sunny day, with rug underneath and tree to the side) and gazing up at the blue and white patchwork.

Cloud gazing not only encourages us to spend time outdoors, but provides some much needed perspective.

The phenomena, much like cotton wool on a good day, move pretty fast in ever-changing patterns. The sense of something bigger than us. We can allow our minds to wander without distraction or focus thoughts on one thing. This can help manage energy and stimulate imagination.

What have you seen in the clouds? Interesting shapes, funny faces? My favourite was a huge duck I saw above the coastline of Antigua.

What charming words:

Cachet

The state of being respected or admired; prestige. (Not to be confused with cache!)

Clandestine

Planned or done in secret, especially as it’s not officially allowed. Naughty indeed.

Cosmopolitan

On a basic level: people, animals, plants etc from or found all over the world. I really like this more updated, specific definition though: having wide, international sophistication; worldly.

It's a great cocktail too! ;-)

Crepuscular

Relating to, resembling, occurring during or most active at twilight.

I hope the letter C captivates and comforts you in January.

D is for Deep Work, Doodling & Dream Interpretation

The devotion to D has been delayed by a month (not because it’s December’s first letter, but due to personal reasons). Details here for you to dabble, discover and discuss... if you dare. :-)

What to explore: Deep Work

A term most associated with Cal Newport, author of Deep Work: Rules for Focused Success in a Distracted World. Deep work refers to distraction-free focus on a demanding task. Honing this skill means we can get more done in less time. In this way, tasks have more meaning and bring a feeling of accomplishment when completed.

Some people refer to this state as 'flow'. It generally requires at least an hour at a time. Although each of us is different. You may find that 25 minute stints, followed by a little break (Pomodoro method) or the length of the average film are more useful allocations in your schedule.

Special note: breaks are absolutely vital. Finding a routine and/or set of rituals is also key. Signal to both your brain and other people that you mean business. Block out your calendar and put devices on silent (or even aeroplane mode!)

Some ideas to help get you in the 'zone':

• Put on 'Deep work' (focus or concentration) playlists (YouTube or Spotify are full of them)
• Move to a different area of your home/office - even if just the other side of the table
• Clear the space from clutter as much as possible

What to experiment with: Doodling

Have you ever found yourself doodling in a meeting or while on the phone? You might not even be consciously aware of it. It could be boredom, anxiety, frustration or just something keeping your hands busy. So much more than a mindless activity, doodling is a great therapeutic tool in short(-ish) bursts - up to 30 minutes.

Like colouring, the repetitive act of creating circles and lines etc with pen and paper can easily, and utterly, absorb our attention. This takes us out of the 'fight/flight/freeze' stress response. We naturally don't care about making mistakes either.

The amazing unknown powers of a little drawing:

• Improves memory and our ability to learn
• Helps generate new ideas and refine others
• An image might just express what you can't say with words
• Sketching a picture that makes you happy will improve your mood

Why not give it a go? No judgement, no intention for artistic success - just experimenting with patterns, shapes and colours.

What to uncover: Dream Interpretation

Sigmund Freud called them “the royal road to the unconscious”, but the nightly shows put on by our brain have fascinated us for thousands of years and beyond. The Ancient Egyptians believed them to be divine messages.

I've always found decoding dreams really fun. What our brain gets up to during REM sleep can be both baffling and insightful. While processing emotional debris from our day, we can also reduce stress, boost creativity and much more. How much do you remember from a dream? Are you aware while in this state? I'd love to know.

Here are some of the benefits of dream analysis:

• Learning more about ourselves
• Processing unresolved emotions in a safe way
• Enhancing problem solving and decision making skills
• Personally, I'd also add - a form of entertainment! Especially if you keep a journal.

What delightful words:

Dauntless

Lots of definitions here but let’s go with ‘courage and bravery’.

Demystify

To ‘remove the mystery’ and clarify something. A nicer word than debunk.

Denouement

Comes from French, meaning 'unknotting'. The final part of a story (film, play, book) where the plot is woven together and resolved. It could be a final scare in horror or one last joke in comedy.

Doppelgänger

From German folklore (doppel - meaning “double,” and gänger - meaning “goer”). An apparition or double of a living person.

I hope the letter D delivers all you deserve and desire in December.